Breaking Conditioning: A Conversation with Dr. Cayte Castrillon
We recently hosted the first session in our new Dharma Dr. Community Conversations series—an open space to go beyond the product and explore what healing looks like in real life, with the people actively doing the work.
In this session, our partnerships manager Michal Barnett was joined by Dr. Cayte Castrillon, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and early Dharma Dr. partner. Dr. Cayte brings two decades of experience as a psychotherapist, and a powerful blend of modalities including EMDR, somatic work, DBT, and clinical sexology.
Together, we unpacked the topic of breaking conditioning and unlearning trauma narratives—how trauma shapes the stories we tell ourselves, how those stories influence our relationships, and what it takes to rewrite the script.
— Watch the full conversation below, or read on for key highlights —
↓
Meet Dr. Cayte
Dr. Cayte has been a psychotherapist for 20 years and has practiced EMDR since 2017. Her career began with a focus on eating disorders and body image, which naturally evolved into deeper work with trauma, embodiment, and sexuality. She later earned her Ph.D. in Clinical Sexology, researching the impact of media—especially pornography—on sexual conditioning in young women.
Today, she works at the intersection of trauma recovery and relational healing, using an integrative approach that meets clients where they are. She also uses Dharma Dr. Tabs in both her personal and clinical practice.
What Is Conditioning in the Context of Trauma?
Dr. Cayte defines conditioning as the implicit beliefs and narratives we absorb through trauma—whether acute or chronic. These narratives don’t just shape how we understand our past—they project onto how we expect our future to unfold.
“Trauma tells us stories about our future, not just about what happened in the past.”
These beliefs often take the form of I am statements:
I am unsafe.
I am alone.
I am not enough.
In therapy, Dr. Cayte works with clients to trace these stories back to their origins—some rooted in trauma, others in early life environments or societal norms—and begins the work of unlearning.
Creating Safety and Rewriting the Script
True healing starts with safety. Dr. Cayte believes in therapeutic relationships that are real, warm, and human. She practices appropriate self-disclosure and avoids perfectionism, inviting clients to do the same:
“Therapy isn’t about being the perfect client. Knowing your therapist is human too can create the freedom to really start diving into what you're struggling with.”
From there, she uses a range of tools to help clients notice patterns, understand their adaptations, and slowly rewire the beliefs and behaviors that no longer serve them. EMDR is one of her go-tos, especially for clients with discrete traumas or long-standing feelings of disempowerment.
How Bilateral Stimulation Supports This Work
Dr. Cayte shared a powerful story about her own introduction to EMDR during a time of high anxiety as a parent. Even after just two sessions paired with guided meditation and bilateral stimulation, her relationship to those anxious moments shifted completely.
That experience continues to inform how she uses Dharma Dr. Tabs—not only in session with her clients, but as a personal grounding tool for stress, sleep, and sensory reconnection. Whether it’s centering before a big meeting or helping her teenage daughter reset between volleyball games, the tabs have become a go-to resource.
“My meditations have been supercharged with the tabs… Anything that grounds you somatically is so powerful.”
🎧 Try Dr. Cayte’s New Meditation in the Dharma Dr. App
As part of her ongoing work with Dharma Dr., Dr. Cayte recently contributed a new guided meditation titled “Sensuality,” now available in the Dharma Dr. App. It’s designed to help listeners reconnect with their senses, regulate their nervous system, and explore embodiment in a grounded, accessible way.
Whether you’re working through trauma, navigating disconnection, or simply want to deepen your self-awareness, this session offers a gentle invitation to come home to your body.
Download the Dharma Dr. App: Get it on the App Store | Get it on Google Play
Trauma Healing ≠ Brokenness
One of the most powerful myths Cayte addressed was the belief that trauma breaks your ability to experience healthy sexuality or connection. In her words:
“I've never had someone unable to reclaim their sexuality. The belief that trauma permanently damages this part of us is one of the most harmful narratives out there.”
Instead, she views healing as a reclamation—a process of reconnecting with the body, the senses, and ultimately, your sense of agency.
What Cayte Is Unlearning Herself
Before wrapping up, we turned the tables and asked Dr. Cayte what she’s personally working to unlearn.
Her answer? People-pleasing.
As the youngest of four, she developed an identity around being “the good one,” which created a pattern of self-silencing to avoid disappointing others.
“Guilt is only helpful when you’re acting outside your values. If you’re advocating for yourself and it makes someone uncomfortable—that’s not guilt, that’s fear. And you can face fear.”
Where to Find Dr. Cayte
Dr. Cayte will soon be hosting a new show called Reel Love on the This Is It Network, exploring how media shapes our understanding of sex, love, and relationships. You can follow her here:
-
Instagram: @communicayte
-
LinkedIn: Dr. Cayte Castrillon
Keep the Conversation Going
We’re so grateful to Dr. Cayte for sharing her time and her insights, and to everyone who joined us live. If you missed it, we hope the recording and this recap give you plenty to reflect on. Feel free to reach out with questions and be sure to subscribe to the newsletter and follow us on Instagram at @mydharmadr for more upcoming events, highlights, and practitioner stories.
Got questions about Dharma Dr. Tabs or how to use them in your practice or personal routine? We’d love to help.
📩 Contact us anytime at support@dharmadr.com
